manscaping

Today in Hot Accountants: “B-Tag” Thinks First Date Sex Is Skanky, ‘I Love You’ Is a Compliment

Yesterday we threw up some accountant student eye candy courtesy of Cosmo’s Bachelor Blowout.

Thanks to Above The Law Managing Editor, David Lat, we’ve discovered even more gratuitous accountant chestiness for those interested.

This time the young man’s name is Tripp Davis and he’s representing Mississippi. Tripp has a few real-world years under his belt so this may be his last chance at superficial fame and fortune.


Some select details on the man who was a Tripp long before a time when we knew who the Palins were (God, we miss those days):

His buddies call him: “B-Tag, because I’m big, tall, and goofy!” [switch a couple letters around and you’ve got yourself something else interesting]

Relationship style: “I won’t date a girl unless I can see myself marrying her down the road. Then I jump into it.” [That’s a Southern Man for you.]

Melt-his-heart words: “I think ‘I love you’ is the best compliment a guy can hear.” [We’ll give him the benefit of doubt here.]

Sex on the first date: “Skanky” [Obvious lie.]

Girls going commando: “Sexy” [Is there another answer to this question?]

Do you manscape? “Yes.” [See our previous comment.]

Okay, so Tripp is a tall Southern gentleman and we’ve got the young Missouri college student. Since we can’t get ahold of Carl’s transcripts or Tripp’s performance reviews, we’ll have to go purely on looks. Judge away.

Mississippi Bachelor 2010 [Cosmopolitan]

Hot Aspiring Accountant Loves to Listen, Manscapes, Needs Your Votes

Whenever we can, we like to sex things up around here. Sometimes it can be difficult but fortunately, this is not one of those days.


This young chap is Carl Koenemann he’s representing Missouri in Cosmo’s Bachelor Blowout and he just happens to be studying the debit and credit trade.

A few swoon-worthy details on Carl: 1) He plays guitar and writes songs; 2) He craves being told that he’s a good listener; 3) He’s perplexed by a woman who thinks he should be able to read her mind; 4) Affirmative on the manscaping question.

Now some ignorant hack at the Riverfront Times thinks that young Carl is “throw[ing] all [his hottness] away to become a buttoned-down bean counter” but that is just one blogger’s shitty opinion.

We think (and we’re sure you agree) that there’s plenty of room for hot men and women in the accounting field. Not that we’re suggesting that Carl completely dismiss his chance at eating disorders or a career in reality TV but we’re sure he’ll have campus recruiters from all Big 4 firms drooling over him, so his career will be just fine.

Missouri Bachelor 2010 [Cosmopolitan]
Carl Koenemann: Manscaping, Accountant Wannabe Needs Your Vote for Sexy Man Contest [Riverfront Times]