Share Your Tips For Getting Through Your Miserable Work Life!

EYStaff started it:

Well I'll kick it off.

When on a conference call, I stay on mute as long as possible and then let a loud fart rip and blame it on any one of the dozen people on the call if anyone tries to call me on it.

When on a particularly long conference call, I find turning on the PlayStation3 the most effective use of my multitasking skills.

When on a really particularly long conference call, I use the opportunity to catch up on dishes, laundry, and reading the Daily Mail.

When it comes to communication with people I don't particularly like, I find using excessive emoticons to be the most effective way to convey how much I can't stand the person without actually being condescending in words. Here's a guide to this type of emoticon usage:

  • =P = that isn't my tongue I'm sticking out at you
  • 😉 = face-to-face, winking at you would be considered sexual harassment. In this email, it means "go fuck yourself"
  • 😀 = I am thrilled that I'm not you
  • 🙂 = I can't believe you are too stupid to realize I hate you

Alright, so who has some tips of their own to share? If you're going to stick 'em on Twitter, be sure to include the hashtags because we're all so helpful like that.

Have something to add to this story? Give us a shout by email, Twitter, or text/call the tipline at 202-505-8885. As always, all tips are anonymous.

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