July 15, 2018

If You’re Going to Commit Fraud, Avoid These Obvious Phrases In Your Company Email (Duh)

Our friend and ex Crazy Eddie CFO Sam Antar has a new bug up his criminal ass, and it's EY teaming up with the FBI to combat obvious fraud. Check this out from Compliance Week:

What do phrases such as "nobody will find out," "grey area,"and "they owe it to me" have in common?

According to research conducted by Ernst & Young in collaboration with the FBI, these phrases are among the top terms used by employees in emails discussing fraud. E&Y has developed software that companies can use to monitor employees' emails for these phrases and approximately 3,000 other words and phrases that are commonly used in emails by people committing fraud.

Well it's a good thing I didn't write "nobody will find out" in those first few emails to my boyfriend at the Federal Reserve, lest his employer discover that we've been banging each other all these years despite me being a known anti Fed troll. WHEW.

It continues:

E&Y says that the top 15 terms used by employees in emails discussing fraud are as follows:

  1. Cover up
  2. Write off
  3. Illegal
  4. Failed investment
  5. Nobody will find out
  6. Grey area
  7. They owe it to me
  8. Do not volunteer information
  9. Not ethical
  10. Off the books
  11. Backdate
  12. No inspection
  13. Pull earnings forward
  14. Special fees
  15. Friendly payments

Alright, maybe I shouldn't even ask this, but did Scott London use his KPMG email to arrange his "trade-offs"? That's a serious question. I mean what he did was brazen and all, and obviously he wasn't very good at it but COME ON.

Is anyone committing real fraud THAT stupid?? I mean really. I don't think even Sam Antar was that stupid and they all got caught.

Related articles

Layoff Watch ’10: Ernst & Young January Edition

Confused doesn’t even begin to describe what were feeling. We are hearing tons of rumors about layoffs in the Ernstiverse this week.

We’ve heard rumors from Denver to the East-Central (fka North-Central) and New York FSO. This includes both client serving professionals and support staff. We have already confirmed that two admins were let go earlier this week in New York.

The timing is especially strange since, you know, it’s January and in some offices the mandatory hours have already rolled out. Even if it were only support staff being let go, the timing is still unheard of. Why wait until January to let people go when having cuts in November? Maybe it’s just us but if we had survived that November cut, we would have thought that our job would be safe until at least the spring.
And since the roundtables seem to be SOP you wouldn’t think they would be anything to worry about but they definitely have people talking and wondering what will go down.

So far, Ernst & Young has not responded to our request for comment.
If you hear anything about your office get in touch in with us and discuss in the comments.

E&Y’s Entrepreneur of the Year Award Just Got a Little More Prestigious

Jim Turley3.jpgFrom what we can tell, the Ernst & Young Entrepreneur of the Year award is a BFD. If the other Big 4 have their own versions of this award, we sure haven’t heard of them.
And even if Deloitte were to start handing out the Uncle Dangle Vigilante of the Year award, it would pale in comparison to the EYEY because, now, a past winner is going to be on The Real Housewives of New York City.
Jennifer Gilbert won her EYEY in 1998 for her business, Save the Date, “A dedicated force of event planners who are in tune with the constantly evolving world of corporate events.” She’s even in the EYEY Hall of Fame. Jesus, this thing has a HoF?
J Dawg has to be bursting over this. Shamelessly up on his desk fist pumping, Tiger Woods style. A soon-to-be reality TV star that, God willing, will name drop E&Y every chance she gets on cable would be the best thing that ever happened to the firm. Sorry, NASCAR HoF.
The Real Housewives of New York Adds a Second New Non-Housewife [Gawker]