When the time comes to leave your firm for industry or -- gasp! -- another firm, you could write some lame farewell email or you could have your bros write a touching farewell on Medium. Apparently, this is the new cool thing.
Fans across the greater Washington, D.C. area reacted with disappointment and some harsh words for local star, certified public accountant Mark Ellison, Monday after the news leaked: the Deloitte phenom had agreed in principle to a contract, and was headed to New York to work for bitter rival KPMG.
“I’ve been following Deloitte D.C. since I was a little kid and my dad put me in a Deloitte t-shirt,” says local athlete and TV personality Robert Griffin III. “I really thought [Ellison] was a ‘Deloitter’ for life. It hurts, man, I’m not gonna lie.”
You can see where this is going. A couple bros are broken up by their fellow bro's departure. Like really broken up.
Another Deloitte fan, Bryce Harper, has skipped sadness and gone straight to anger. “[Expletive] that, man. I’ve followed his career since he was a summer intern. Remember when he screwed up the PowerPoint slides in the big client meeting in ‘09 and half the city wanted him gone? I stuck by him the whole time, and now he just jumps the instant someone offers a big contract. And KPMG, no less. It’s all about the money, man. There’s no pride left in public accounting anymore.” Asked if he will boo Ellison when the Deloitte delegation returns for a planned CPA conference in July, Harper responded: “Absolutely. Absolutely.”
We can only hope Ellison can rise above the boos, much like LeBron's triumphant return to Cleveland to pound the Cavs 118 - 90 with the Heat. Although, considering KPMG is involved here, we aren't sure how triumphant that return will be.
One bro is quoted as saying “Ellison is a true old-school accountant, like straight out of the pleated-slacks days. You could tell from his rookie year out of college he was a natural. The way he worked a spreadsheet was a thing of beauty."
Another said of the impact this will have on the Deloitte team in Washington, “They’ve got some good young talent in the system, but they’re going to miss that veteran leadership in the break room.”
We will keep you updated with any developments.