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Accountant Claims That She Has Trouble Controlling the Volume of Her Voice

Posted on by Caleb Newquist

This is understandable. We know a few people that have been accused of being “angry” when, in fact, they are just being “loud.”

Negros Occidental Provincial Accountant Merly Fortu denied on Sunday that she acted with arrogance and hostility when she met with the elected provincial government officials on July 1.

Fortu, who faced administrative charges for grave misconduct and gross insubordination for allegedly shouting at elected provincial government officials during the meeting, explained that her normal speaking voice was “a little bit louder” than others.

It is similar (albeit the opposite) to having shy/asshole confusion.

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SHOCKER: GAO Says the Federal Government Has Weak Internal Controls

Talk about a blow. Everyone here at GC soiled themselves after finding out this piece of news.

The mother of all auditors, the General Accountability Office, released its FY 2009 Financial Report for the U.S. Government last week and things are, shall we say, typical. How typical? How about things are such a mess that the GAO can’t render an opinion on the consolidated financial statements?

“The U.S. Government Accountability Office (GAO) could not render an opinion on the consolidated financial statements of the federal government (other than the Statement of Social Insurance) because of widespread material internal control weaknesses and other limitations.”


That’s from the press release and while we were expecting a shitshow spread amongst all the agencies of the government, it’s due to the weaknesses in four agencies: the Defense Department, Homeland Security, State Department, and NASA.

Here’s the full rundown on the agencies from the report:

You may remember us noting the Defense Department’s audit problems back in the fall when we said:

For one of the 69 reviews the GAO performed, the audit report cited eight significant deficiencies in the contractor’s accounting system but since the contractor wasn’t really cool with that, the auditors dropped five of the [significant deficiencies] and recommended that the other three be “improved without additional work”.

So this really, really, really does come as a surprise. It is good to know that the GAO — never shy on tooting its own horn — is still out there earning it’s “taxpayer watchdog” badge.

At 256 pages, this thing is a beast. We’re plowing through it to find the more interesting tidbits where we can and if you’re on cruise control today, take a gander for yourself to see your tax dollars at work.

Fiscal Year 2009 Financial Report of the United States Government [GAO.gov]
U.S. Government’s 2009 Financial Report Shows Significant Fiscal Challenges [Press Release]
GAO Cites Weak Financial Management in Federal Government [Web CPA Debits & Credits]

Will Keith Fimian Request a Recount for Virginia’s 11th Congressional Seat?

The final Congressional race featuring an accountant is in Virginia’s 11th District where KPMG alum Keith Fimian trails incumbent Gerry Connolly by less than half a point:

Challenger Keith Fimian was able to pick up votes on incumbent Gerry Connolly as a result, but not enough to make a significant dent in Connolly’s lead. There are still approximately 250 provisional ballots to be counted.

As of 1:30 p.m., the vote in the 11th District as a whole is:

Connolly: 111,630 (49.21%)
Fimian: 110, 700 (48.80%)

Fimian has to request the recount and has until November 22nd when the election becomes official. Because the margin is less half a percentage point, the recount would be paid for by Virginia (i.e. the taxpayers). No pressure, Keith. You best sleep on it for a day or two.

Friday Footnotes: Fines, Fines, Fines; Team Deloitte Going For Gold; Party’s Over For One Fraudster | 8.2.19

Is Your Accountant a Wimp? [Entrepreneur] SLANDEROUS. Audit regulator fines PwC Mexico $100,000 for violating […]