Well damn, we’re fairly sure it couldn’t get any worse than that for TierOne, could it?
Citing risk of material misstatement, KPMG has also warned the audit committee that TierOne’s financials are not to be relied upon by investors. Even Overstock.com doesn’t get that kind of treatment.
Last month the Office of Thrift Supervision – TierOne’s primary regulator – gave it until April 30th to merge with or sell its assets to a healthier financial institution so we’re going to go out on a limb here by assuming that they aren’t going to have good news come Friday and KPMG is just doing the responsible thing by backing away from the mess with a week left.
Recently we came across a version of Ke$ha’s “Tik Tok” for auditors. The battle over who actually coined this ode to opining was up for grabs but now it’s been brought to our attention that throwback tunes are also being rewritten to express the plight of auditors.
Surely there’s a divergence of opinion – right down generational lines – on which rewrite is better but working in “fat finger” and “Friends think I do tax ’cause of the ‘CPA’ ” scores big points in our book.
To the tune of “No Sleep ’til Brooklyn” by the Beastie Boys
(chorus) No sleep ’til – Filing
Hand on the tenkey – never a fat finger
Got work to do, I hope this client don’t linger
My job ain’t a job – it’s a damn good time
Gonna get this tied-out to the dime
On location – cursing damnation
Why’re my client contacts always on vacation?
Eight of us crammed around this audit table
I do what I do best because I’m willing and able
Ain’t no fakin’ – audit fees I’m rakin’ in
Goin’ coast to coast vouching money you’re makin’
While you’re at the job working nine to five
I’m still at the office when you arrive
(bridge) No sleep ’til –
Another spill, another thrill
Another freaking fire drill
Caffiene gum – another SUM
I wish this Diet Coke had some rum
Now where’s my contact? – he always disappears
This is the guidance, why can’t he just adhere?
Been so long since I’ve seen my fam’
I wish my computer had more RAM
We’re thrashing financials like it’s going out of style
Getting paid along the way cause it’s worth your while
Quarter after four – IA’s out the door
I’m chained to my computer for six hours more
We got a drawer with a lock to hold our files
Aside from the ones all over our table in piles
(repeat bridge)
(repeat chorus)
Ain’t seen the light since we started this audit
All we need is in this room- we got it
Born and bred to document all day
Friends think I do tax ’cause of the “CPA”
That’s not right but I don’t care
‘Cause whenever I explain it they just stare.
Got coffee, cola, chips and candy
I’ve gained ten pounds ain’t it just dandy?
Step off homes – get out of my way
‘Cause our signed opinion is the final say
Waking up before I get to sleep
Cause I’ll be rocking this party eight days a week
No sleep till filing ….
No sleep till filing …
No sleep till filing …
No sleep till filing…
No sleep till filing…
And just in case you’ve got no idea what this should sound like: